The Voice of Truth

The other day as I was getting ready, I looked in the mirror and felt overwhelmed with life.  I'm in my 30s and my face seems to be a contradiction of itself- breakouts like I'm still in middle school combined with newly formed laugh lines and crows feet.  My body is a far cry from what it used to be after 4 pregnancies- 3 of which were within a 2-year span, 2 of which resulted in miscarriages.  Though I lost the mere 7 pounds I had gained during my fourth pregnancy rather quickly, I'm still working on the leftovers from my pregnancy with Will, our 19-month-old.  My efforts over the past couple months have been successful and I'm headed in the right direction, but just once I'd like to finish a workout, immediately turn to the side while looking at myself in the mirror, and be able to think, "Hey!  Those crunches really worked!"  Unfortunately, that's not the way it works, and the same goes for parenting.  We do our best to teach our kids what we think they need to know in life, but for the time being we have no clue if it's getting through or how they'll turn out as adults. 

So there I was, frustrated with life in general, and I asked God for a Word.  Something that would speak to me, encourage me, tell me it all counts for something and that my efforts of parenting, exercising, trying to honor and love my husband, and all the other big and small things of day-to-day life are worth it.  I was listening to K-Love on my iPhone app (because the greater Washington, D.C. area doesn't have a station- what's up with that?) and the song "The Voice of Truth" by Casting Crowns was playing.  I looked down at the screen and saw the verse of the day was Galatians 6:9, which says, "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up."  I attended a Christian high school where we had a science teacher, Mr. Owen, who had us memorize this verse and write it at the end of every quiz and test he gave us.  So to me this verse has always had a specific meaning for me- study hard, get a good grade.  Now, I realize that's not the point of the Scripture or even what Mr. Owen was trying to teach us, but that has always been my association for it.  But as I listened to the words of that song, thought about the verse, and reviewed my life as it is right now, I realized that the voice of Truth, the voice of the Lord, was telling me that what I'm doing right now matters.  Doing the little things to make my husband happy- fixing the coffee at night so he can have a hot cup first thing in the morning, making the bed every day before he gets home from work, doing my best to manage our finances wisely while I'm shopping at the commissary or Target; working out and eating healthy not to look hot or turn heads, but to set a good example for my children and take care of this bodily temple in which resides the Holy Spirit; loving my children- whether that comes in the form of playing on the floor with them, letting them figure things out on their own so they can become independent, or disciplining them even when it hurts...these things matter.  What could be more important to me than raising my children to walk with the Lord?

It has taken weeks- months even- of hard work, but the weight I gained while pregnant is coming off, and I'm feeling healthier.  My husband says my countenance has changed.  He actually used that word- countenance.  He also thanks me repeatedly for taking care of the coffee, because it's one less responsibility on his very full plate.  Our boys love each other- immensely- and our older son Charlie asks deep, and I mean deep, theological questions, because we are talking about God with him all the time.  Any chance we have to tie something to the Bible or God's character, we do.  And I'm noticing it.  There are certainly days when I look at myself and feel like all my hard work in so many areas isn't making a dent in the big scheme of things, but the Bible promises, specifically in Galatians 6:9, that it will pay off...if we do not give up. It just may not happen when I want it to.  But if I stick with it, if I persevere, forge ahead even when I don't feel like it, God will be faithful to bring about change in my life and the life of my family.  And that, I know without a doubt, is truth.